Sunday, September 28, 2008

Top 10 Reasons I Do Not Like UT Football

10. The games look like a big tight-pantsed wrestling match to me because I don't know any of the rules, and I can't stay interested long enough to learn them.
9. UT orange is brassy and repellent.
8. It turns my otherwise sensible husband into a raving maniac.
7. You have to shell out good money to see it.
6. There's a game on every single fall weekend.
5. It leads to too much shouting and bad behavior about something that has absolutely no bearing on your life.
4. There's almost no focus on what's interesting: Smokey, the cheerleaders, and how to wear orange tastefully.
3. Neyland Stadium smells bad.
2. The "T" logo is simplistic and unimaginative. And I'm tired of seeing it on XXXL t-shirts.

AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON I DO NOT LIKE UT FOOTBALL IS (drumroll)

1. That team loses an awful damn lot.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

What about the big fat guy who keeps getting a raise that is bigger than my salary? Maybe I'm off base here, but I thought big raises went to people who did their jobs well and EARNED them.

500Jerk said...

Whoa, Anonymous, you're making WAY too much senses. Been following Wall Street? Big raises are contracted long before everything goes to pot, not EARNED, you silly thing.