This morning was not one of my better mornings. Despite last night’s work of putting together lunches, setting out the breakfast dishes, and choosing clothes for the kids to wear, then getting up at 6:30AM to unload the dishwasher, hurry the kids along, and get ready myself, by 8:10AM breakfast basically was uneaten, one kid did not have his shoes on, and the other did not have her hair brushed. Of course, neither one was wearing a coat. And what is it, like 23 degrees? Teeth brushed? Oh, please.
So what did I do? Did I draw on my vast maternal reserves of patience and kindness? Did I set a good example by speaking in a calm and measured tone? Oh no. I shouted. A LOT. About responsibility and consideration and not playing with your freaking Legos until your jobs are done. That my job title is not House Servant, that there actually is such a thing as personal responsibility even when you're a kid, and that every day the same things must be done: clothes ON, breakfast EATEN, dishes CLEARED, and lunch bags TAKEN. How I'm tired of kids not listening unless I shout at them. And do they want to end up in jail when they grow up because they can't listen? Oh, the horror. It went on and on until the dog hid and my kids were practically deaf.
Did I mention the 500Jerk Spouse is out of town?
Honey, you need to come home before we all need hearing aids prematurely. I’m losing it here.